WHEN THEY CHEAT: IS INFIDELITY BECOMING THE NEW NORMAL?

"Side by side, yet miles apart."
What happens when presence doesn't equal connection?

Married People and Spouses — Your Favourite Boo is Back With Another One!

Love, they say, is the greatest gift of all, many people spend their lives searching for "THE ONE,"—that one person who was crafted specially for you, who gets you in a sea of people. 

But lets be honest...does "the one" really exist or are we in love with the idea of it?

 

"There is no perfect , there will always be struggle, you just have to pick who you want to struggle with"     

                                                                                — Before you go {movie} 

Personally, I believe the "one exists"—to an extent But unlike fairytales, they won't magically know all your thoughts, pet peeves, or your favorite way to be loved. They aren't just going  to get you and know what you're thinking before you say it.

Nope. It doesn't work that way guys, you still need to put in the effort and time to get to know each other, to talk and relate. Ands when it clicks and you find yourself thinking about them all the time, you know you've found 'your one.'

But What Happens When "Your Person" Cheats?

Maybe you're in a relationship. Maybe you're married. Maybe he was “the one.” And now… he cheats.

 Now look, some people are in open marriages are allowed to explore, if that's you, kudos. Do you, sis. As long as you’re safe and it’s consensual, live your life.

Some spouses are fine with infidelity in their romantic relationships as long as the side piece stays away from the home and they’re assured the cheating partner will always come back to them. If that arrangement works for both parties and boundaries are respected, then it’s entirely their choice. Everyone handles relationships differently, and what matters most is mutual understanding and consent.

But for the girls who can't do it, let's talk.

First off: cheating in relationships isn't normal or natural.

 The internet has romanticized infidelity, especially for men, and tried to make it look like a natural phenomenon  it isn't. Cheating isn't a default.  It’s not biology. It’s a CHOICE.

"It's possible to meet someone who is perfect for you while you are committed to someone else but if you're committed to someone, you do not allow yourself to find perfection in someone else."

                                         — Before you go {movie}  

Once is a mistake.

Twice? That’s a pattern.

Three times? It’s not a joke anymore. BABY, that’s a habit.

 Ian Fleming frames it beautifully well, 

 

"Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.” 

                                                                — Ian Fleming {James Bond, #7}

Do you hear that ladies, enemy action. 

That man who keeps hurting you? He’s not just careless—he's your ENEMY!!! And that's on period. Quote me anywhere. 

Rihanna once said, "Make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world." 

Let me tell you something, you shouldn't just feel like the only girl in his world...

YOU SHOULD BE THE ONLY GIRL IN HIS WORLD.

If he says you're "enough," then what's he doing out there being greedy?

The Real Cost of Cheating? Trust.

 

"Every look, every joke, every time we made love became lies, there's no coming back from that"

                                                                                     — Brooke {Before We Go} 

Once the trust in a relationship breaks, it taints everything—your self-esteem, your mental peace, your ability to believe in love again.

So, sis, open your eyes.
If he's  cheating while dating, chances are he’ll keep cheating in marriage too. 

Choose your poison:

•  Be alone and at peace, or
• Married and constantly questioning your worth.

If you know infidelity is a deal breaker for you, say it early. Communicate it clearly before things get serious. I once spoke to a guy who said, “No man can be faithful. All men cheat.”
You think I stayed to test that theory? I took to my heels! I ran. Fast.

Notice the red flags now, before it’s too late—before he gives you an incurable STD or brings kids home for you to raise.

And to the Cheaters...

STAY PUT!!!
Control yourself.
Stop putting your partners through emotional trauma.
JEEZ!!